Church Communication 101

What a wonderful day of rest it was yesterday; I got to baptize my son (whoop-whoop!), it was Mother’s Day, and ESPN had a great baseball game on last night (I think that list is prioritized correctly, although I possibly could switch Mom’s Day and ESPN, but that’s another story). But back to the ballgame…

I always love watching Mike Scioscia, the manager of the LAA Angels, manage a game. He continually touches his fingers to his ears, cheeks, arms in an infinite number of variations, signaling different instructions to his players. He sends out signs from the dugout on EVERY pitch; calling pitch-outs, positioning players, ordering pizza. I’m not really sure about that last one, but Mike does look like he enjoys the occasional pie.

But it got me to thinking…as a pastor who stands in front of a congregation weekly, what signs could/should I be communicating with the folks in the pews (yup, we actually sit on those things)? Here’s a couple I thought might come in handy at times:

1. Right ear…left ear…nose…chin…stomach:  ‘your child has already gone to the bathroom seven times; maybe they need to go to the doctor and be checked for a bladder infection.’

2. Left ear…right ear…left ear…1 finger: ‘the person beside you is quite possibly in deep REM sleep; wet your finger and stick it in their ear.’

3. Nose…chin…nose…chin…flash ten fingers repeatedly: ‘if you guys don’t start looking like you’re paying attention, I’m going to keep preaching past noon in 10 minute blocks.’

Those are just a couple to get us started. When we master these, we’ll add more. As we know, it’s all about communication.

About pastoroftheprez

Pastor of First Presbyterian Church in Kings Mountain, NC.
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One Response to Church Communication 101

  1. Bridget says:

    Please, please use #2 and see how many wet willie's we get!!

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